A poem/song thing I wrote.

[Unitik908]

Some mild language, just a heads up.
Tell me what you think.
enjoy

A little thing called life


Whether it may be
kicking around the rock
rolling around the block
smokin all that pot
whatever it may be
I choose it to set me free
from my preformed destiny
of amounting to nothing, never to succeed

Life to many may seem
fun and free like a dream
but for those like me
the drive, the will, desire never
seems to deam themselves necessary

I may appear care free, but the
thoughts of life, future, and
the unknown terrorfy me
skeptiscism trys to keep me sain
never believing I'll end up like kobain
being, meaning something
is all i really strive for
knowing this why do I refuse to try
instead have my head implanted in the sky
sleeping on this lie, that all will end up fine.

Going to school, the prison for the lazy
for many it is all just a joke
the brilliant potential lost of all
those who have been diluted
I really hate to say it, myself included.
sending me further down the hall,
forcing me up that never ending wall
we call life.

31 days to name and
what do I have to acount for it?
Not a God damn thing.
Could have done so much
but instead did so little.
Alone, isolated, depressed
choosing the easy way out.

I've had chances to do something for the better
but instead chose to lift a single finger.
To many regrets, not enough pride
sends me sliding down that familiar path
we call life.

Pressure from the free world.
Pressure from society; to be on top
number 1 for all to see; to be the pennicale of conformity.
Pressure from parents; like a whip accross my back.
Pressure to fill them with pride and I just subside and hide
by running and getting high.
Always expecting so much, yet saying so little
Forcing me to lean on my one true crutch
that is the energy, love, and support
of my dearest friends.
Knowing that no matter how bad I fuck up
they will be with me 'till the bittersweet end.

I choose what I choose to set me free
from my preformed destiny
of amounting to nothing, never to succeed.

Just thought I'd share that.

Chase

[JJtheunicycle]

thats really good, i liked the 2nd to last paragraph

[dudewithasock]

I sorta skimmed it, but I like what I saw.

[saskatchewanian]

Originally Posted by JJtheunicycle

thats really good, i liked the 2nd to last paragraph

My thoughts exactly, very well done.

[munimanpete]

Nice dude, good writing, cheers for sharing.

[Ducttape]

nice dude...... I can totally well, get it you know?

[wickedbob]

That is grrrreat I really like it. That was most awesome..... totally........

[MuniAddict]

That was great! I enjoyed it and I feel your pain. I used to have pretty bad bouts with depression, and so one day about 10 years ago I decided to write a poem about how I was feeling, thinking it would be good therepy.

It came to me pretty quickly and literally flowed out of my pen as you see it below. This is the *first* time I've ever shared this with anyone, let alone a forum! Here it is:


"My Due" by Terry Peterson (Written in 1996)


In the frozen cold of winter, shivering in the night
I pray for death to claim me, before the morning light
All those I've loved have gone, but still I go on and on...

Ah, but that's the cruelest fate of all;
to be left alone when loved ones fall

I have no means for food or shelter,
And in the heat of day when others swelter
I huddle in a corner, still and numb,
Shattered spirit, forgotten son!

A sea of life's misfortunes, has washed upon the sand,
And in its wake has left... this bitter, sad old man
'Though worthless and wretched, and pennyless too,
Pity me not, for this is my due.

Terry Peterson

[wickedbob]

That was cool to...

[Ducttape]

Originally Posted by MuniAddict

That was great! I enjoyed it and I feel your pain. I used to have pretty bad bouts with depression, and so one day about 10 years ago I decided to write a poem about how I was feeling, thinking it would be good therepy.

It came to me pretty quickly and literally flowed out of my pen as you see it below. This is the *first* time I've ever shared this with anyone, let alone a forum! Here it is:


"My Due" by Terry Peterson (Written in 1996)


In the frozen cold of winter, shivering in the night
I pray for death to claim me, before the morning light
All those I've loved have gone, but still I go on and on...

Ah, but that's the cruelest fate of all;
to be left alone when loved ones fall

I have no means for food or shelter,
And in the heat of day when others swelter
I huddle in a corner, still and numb,
Shattered spirit, forgotten son!

A sea of life's misfortunes, has washed upon the sand,
And in its wake has left... this bitter, sad old man
'Though worthless and wretched, and pennyless too,
Pity me not, for this is my due.

Terry Peterson

cool, again I can relate.... all I can say is.... I can totally well, get it you know?

[spazdude222]

It's good. You've got talent, but I personally don't like it. It seems too depressing for my taste.

[dudewithasock]

Originally Posted by spazdude222

It's good. You've got talent, but I personally don't like it. It seems too depressing for my taste.

+1

[MuniAddict]

Originally Posted by spazdude222

It's good. You've got talent, but I personally don't like it. It seems too depressing for my taste.

YEah I hear you. Of course some of the greatest works in poetry, music and film have *quite* tragic themes/overtones. Poe, Shakespere, beethoven, Dylan, Spielberg, Bergman.

So I'm in good company I guess, even though I'm a nobody! And more films with dramatic themes have won critical acclaim and awards than comedies or stuff like, say, "Kindergarten cop". And people in general will usually gravitate towards less challenging stuff like "Meet the Fockers", then say, "Schindler's list", which is obviously a great film but because of the serious content, not the runaway box office of a "Star Wars" for example, which is pure escapist entertainment. But then there are exceptions, such as "The Passion of the Christ", which I hated by the way! Talk about depressing and brutally violent, but it was a qualified box office Monster, and one of the highest grossing films ever.

There's a place for "fluff" and light-hearted fair, but I also appreciate art that has a lasting impact and actually tries to say something, whether positive or negative.

That poem I wrote doesn't represent who I am today, and was even a bit exaggerated for effect when written for, "Poetic license".

[Funicycle]

Nice, needs more cowbell :P

[MuniAddict]

Originally Posted by Funicycle

Nice, needs more cowbell :P

Fellas, fellas, what's up? That last take...was even better than the last one! Guys, I'm tellin' ya, I gotta feva! And the only prescription...is MORE COWBELL!