Required Emoticon Course

[BillyTheMountain]

There has been a lot of discussion about misunderstandings and hurt feelings disrupting the wonderful friendships we share here in the Unicyclist.Community.

I personally get hundreds of PMs a week about this, and people asking whether I think so-and-so was serious when she said blah-blah-blah.

It's become clear that we could all get along better here if people were required to pass an Emoticon Course before posting here.

Here's some examples of confusion caused by failure to use emoticons:

First from the Hello! thread:

Originally Posted by cosmic_dave

I have no idea if you're being serious, or sarcastic.

Originally Posted by podzol

Neither. I am being silly!

It took me awhile to learn who is goofing and who's always serious on the fora. For example: Harper is almost always serious, and John Foss is almost always joking. It is actually the exact opposite with those two.

Blake

And from the Unicycle for Christ thread, you can see the deep misunderstanding which arose because James and Spudman failed to use the emoticon when discussing Jesus.

Originally Posted by James_Potter

Makes sense that Jesus would ride a BC wheel...he just seems like that kind of guy.

Originally Posted by Spudman

Wasn't He also the first and only one to ever ride a BC wheel on water? I have yet to see anyone do that trick since then...

It's hard to tell whether James and Spudman are joking, yes?

I've since learned that Blake signed up for Cathwood's on-line Social Skills Training Course, and has demonstrated dramatic gains in the use of humor and emoticons.

Your [serious] thoughts [only], please.

Peace, Billy

[dudewithasock]

[James_Potter]

Originally Posted by BillyTheMountain

Your [serious] thoughts [only], please.

I think you meant to say:

Originally Posted by BillyTheMountain

Your [serious] thoughts [only], please.

[UniBrier]

Wait until Harper sees this thread.

[phlegm]

[unisteez]

Originally Posted by UniBrier

Wait until Harper sees this thread.

hahaha i wish there was a laughing emoticon.

[Mikefule]

Hey, awesome idea! It sucks that Jane Austen, Shakespeare, Chaucer, Wodehouse, Dickens, Hardy, Twain, Sartre, and Plato had to write without the max benefits of the emoticon, dudes.

[skianduniaddict]

we need a sarcastic one

[BillyTheMountain]

Originally Posted by Mikefule

Hey, awesome idea! It sucks that Jane Austen, Shakespeare, Chaucer, Wodehouse, Dickens, Hardy, Twain, Sartre, and Plato had to write without the max benefits of the emoticon, dudes.

Too true! So many students had found these writers difficult to comprehend until the new Emoticon editions of Shakespeare and the others, selling like hotcakes! Except for Plato, a rather humorless dude who seems beyond help.

[Mikefule]

Originally Posted by skianduniaddict

we need a sarcastic one

Indeed, but first we need to define the levels of sarcasm.

In an ideal world, we would need emoticons for biting sarcasm, gently chiding sarcasm, dry irony, arch comments, self-deprecating irony...

[BillyTheMountain]

Originally Posted by Mikefule

Indeed, but first we need to define the levels of sarcasm.

In an ideal world, we would need emoticons for biting sarcasm, gently chiding sarcasm, dry irony, arch comments, self-deprecating irony...

You're on to something, fer sure.

The top 6 smilies to your right will be inserted into 1st grade reading books, with the next 6 in 2nd and 3rd grade.

Sarcasm is a developmental marker, which a normal IQ youngster prolly begins to grasp receptively in 5th or 6th grade, but does not begin to use expressively until 7th or 8th grade.

So your enhanced emoticon vocabulary is on the agenda of the School Board for the next meeting, and the publishers are rolling the presses.

[cathwood]

Ofcourse, the whole point of irony is that it is done with a straight face. So we would need a 'straight face' emoticon to indicate irony.

Cathy

[unisteve]

Originally Posted by cathwood

Ofcourse, the whole point of irony is that it is done with a straight face. So we would need a 'straight face' emoticon to indicate irony.

Cathy

If you have a straight face emoticon it sort of ruins the subtlety.

Then again, emoticons ruin the subtlety of pretty much everything. That may have been some kind of irony right there, but I'm not sure enough to call it one way or the other.

[cathwood]

Mmm, internet forum/subtelty. I don't think so.

Cathy

[harper]

WHERE CAN I SIGN UP?

May I bring my pistols?