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Old 2017-11-29, 05:37 AM   #11
Bridge of Otherwhere: on Kindle
Mikefule's Avatar
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Long Bennington, Lincolnshire, England.
Posts: 7,190
Originally Posted by Up Rite View Post

Create a prison program to rehabilitate criminals with unicycling.
I can see the films now:

The wheelman of Alcatraz. A man doing life in the high security prison secretly builds a unicycle and escapes along a very long slackline from his prison window.

The Greatest Escape on Earth. While some of the POWs are doing back flips on a vaulting horse that conceals the entrance to an escape tunnel, others are practising a human pyramid on unicycles. The soil from the tunnel is disposed of from the trouser legs of a clown on a giraffe unicycle - he can carry about half a ton in one journey, but pedalling is hard work. Eventually, when the tunnel is ready, the one with the giraffe can't get through because the tunnels is too low, although he speaks the immortal line,"Take me with you, I can seat drag perfectly."

Eventually, most of the escapees are recaptured, leaving only one who gets close to the border. He is pursued by Nazis on b*kes, but his G24 with 110mm cranks keeps him just ahead. As he approaches the border fence, he lines up for a rolling hop but just fails to nail it and is caught within sight of freedom.

Meanwhile, another makes it as far as having his papers checked at the railways station. He speaks perfect German and thinks he has got through, but the soldier on the security desk is suspicious and catches him out as he rides away by saying, "Vere is your utter veel?" and he replies in English, "On my other unicycle." There is a burst of machine gun fire...
My first novel, Bridge of Otherwhere, Michael Wilkinson, on Kindle. A tale of subtle magic, mystery, friendship and love. For US$ page:
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