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joe
2008-06-15, 10:07 PM
Do you know Jack?

Who is Jack Schitt? The lineage is finally revealed! Many people are at a loss for a response when someone says: "You don't know Jack Schitt."
Now you can intellectually handle the situation:

Jack is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt.
They had one son, Jack. In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The Deeply religious couple produced six children: Holie Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Giva Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins Deap Schitt and Dip Schitt.
Against her parents objection, Deap Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout.
After being married for 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced.
Noe Schitt later remarried Ted Sherlock and, because her kids were still living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Shitt Sherlock.

Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt and they produced a son of nervous disposition, Chicken Schitt.

Two of the other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony.
The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens Wedding.
The Schitt-Happens children were Daawg, Byrd, Hoarse and Bull.
Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.

So now when someone says "You don't know Jack Schitt", You can correct them!

1-wheeled-grape
2008-06-15, 10:11 PM
Very long winded joke, quite amusing though, with what appears to be insest in there too?

The title confused me though, because I have a brother named jack and was about to say "yeah I know a Jack" Jack ahs to be one of the worst names to have joke wise, all the jokes to be made
Cracker Jack
Quacker Jack (my brother has ducks!)
Car Jack
HIgh Jack-ing
Jack door
Jack hammer
Blab blah blah there are loads!

Congratulations beeper, you know jack Schitt!

beeper
2008-06-15, 10:14 PM
I know Jack Schitt!

Goats_On_Unicycles
2008-06-15, 10:16 PM
Haha, that was pretty good!

jamessd
2008-06-15, 10:18 PM
Jack-an-acka-nory!

beeper
2008-06-15, 10:18 PM
Congratulations beeper, you know jack Schitt!


Yea, I feel kinda bad for him though, his career went down the toilet.

jamessd
2008-06-15, 10:20 PM
hahahaha

john_childs
2008-06-16, 05:31 AM
In unicycling circles there is only one Jack, and that is Jack Hughes (http://www.unicyclist.com/forums/showthread.php?t=26674) of Team Jack. I do, in fact, know Jack.