i need big advice!!!!!!

[brendon557]

so im 16 and

on friday i was at work and i got this girls phone number, she added me on myspace and i just veiwed her profile for the first time and she has a 1month old baby!! and she is 16 to



idk wat to do, like my mom wants to meet her cus i told her we were hanging out and i dont want her to meet my mom now lol,



I culd just block her and not answer her phone calls but she knows whwere i work.

i culd just get in and out but thats mean lol and im starting to think thats not the best idea lol



Advice needed lol

[habbywall]

What is it with you and under age pregnancy?

[brendon557]

What is it with you and under age pregnancy?
IDK i dont like it tho, i reallly dont know wat to do.i wanna cry lol

[Phil_on_uni]

so im 16 and

on friday i was at work and i got this girls phone number, she added me on myspace and i just veiwed her profile for the first time and she has a 1month old baby!! and she is 16 to
idk wat to do, like my mom wants to meet her cus i told her we were hanging out and i dont want her to meet my mom now lol,
I culd just block her and not answer her phone calls but she knows whwere i work.
i culd just get in and out but thats mean lol and im starting to think thats not the best idea lol
Advice needed lol

just role with it. its no big deal if your mom meets her. its not your kid... do know worries. If shes cool, shes cool. but i would not recomend "getting in then getting out" that always tends to end with bad juju. or another kid :eek:

[brendon557]

just role with it. its no big deal if your mom meets her. its not your kid... do know worries. If shes cool, shes cool. but i would not recomend "getting in then getting out" that always tends to end with bad juju. or another kid :eek:
yeh, but my mom is hardcor christian, tho, thats why i dont want her to meet her

[Jerrick]

If you are not ready and/or wanting a relationship that includes caring, raising, supporting a baby and kinda being a father and having a family, then tell her that.

Maybe it seems mean, maybe it seems a bit immature to some people, but at your age and from what it seems like what you want, I think that would be the most mature thing to do.

Be nice about it though, but dont beat around the bush either.

Unless you do like her enough that her having a kid doesnt phase you, then go with it.

[Phil_on_uni]

yeh, but my mom is hardcor christian, tho, thats why i dont want her to meet her

and remeber, it dosent matter much what you mother think, just as long as you take and respect her opinion of the situation

[net_hippy]

If you are not ready and/or wanting a relationship that includes caring, raising, supporting a baby and kinda being a father and having a family, then tell her that.

Maybe it seems mean, maybe it seems a bit immature to some people, but at your age and from what it seems like what you want, I think that would be the most mature thing to do.

Be nice about it though, but dont beat around the bush either.

Unless you do like her enough that her having a kid doesnt phase you, then go with it.

Agreed. Personally, I wouldn't want to get into a relationship with someone who had a kid because that's a lot more responsibility than a simple gilrfriend. I'm 20 and have way too much on in my life to be able to support a kid. Depends how much you like her though. If not, you just have to say you're not ready for a relationship. You don't necessarily have to tell het it's cos she has a kid.

[GILD]

yeh, but my mom is hardcor christian
In that case, surely, your mom will find it in herself to FORGIVE this poor girl her 'mistake'?

[brendon557]

In that case, surely, your mom will find it in herself to FORGIVE this poor girl her 'mistake'?
i culd care less about that, its how my mom wuld think of me,, everyonc in a while she brings up wat happeend a while back, and i dont want her to be all like theres something wrong with my son, thats 2 grils now,

[GILD]

everyonc in a while she brings up wat happeend a while back
She may need to rethink her 'hardcore xtianity' in that case.

[brendon557]

She may need to rethink her 'hardcore xtianity' in that case.
i dont get it.
xainity=insanity?

[ridethelobster2008]

If you are not ready and/or wanting a relationship that includes caring, raising, supporting a baby and kinda being a father and having a family, then tell her that.

Maybe it seems mean, maybe it seems a bit immature to some people, but at your age and from what it seems like what you want, I think that would be the most mature thing to do.

Be nice about it though, but dont beat around the bush either.

Unless you do like her enough that her having a kid doesnt phase you, then go with it.


This seems like good advice. It may seem hard now, but you have taken on an adult situation. As chess grandmasters say, when you are behind, complicate. When you are ahead, simplify. Do not over think this. Do as Jerrick advises.
Be well,
william

[kington99]

i dont get it.
xainity=insanity?


you know how xmas is short for christmas?

and I don't see the big deal, can't you just be mates with her?

[brendon557]

you know how xmas is short for christmas?

and I don't see the big deal, can't you just be mates with her?
oooo

mates as in frends?

If so thats wat im thikning. ill probally call her tomorow and telll her that i wanna be frends insted.


Good advice Jerrick,
Thanks

[catinabag1]

chicks are evil. i have mathematical proof!:D

[Hazmat]

chicks are evil. i have mathematical proof!:D
If it's that graph thing. You should post it. :D

[catinabag1]

If it's that graph thing. You should post it. :D
its an equation type proof. i'll post it tomorrow or something. right now i just dont wanna take the time. im lazy!:D

[vanpaun]

its because in alaska, when it goes "dark" kids get depressed, have sex, use drugs, hang themselves

[Hazmat]

its because in alaska, when it goes "dark" kids get depressed, have sex, use drugs, hang themselves
Hawo vanpaun. :D


1) WHOA DUDE!!! :eek:

[kington99]

its an equation type proof. i'll post it tomorrow or something. right now i just dont wanna take the time. im lazy!:D

off the top of my head

women = time x money

time=money

therefore

women = money^2


money is the root of all evil i.e. money = evil^0.5

therefore women = evil

EDIT: i guess a line women = (evil^0.5)^2 in there might make the final substitution easier

[catinabag1]

off the top of my head

women = time x money

time=money

therefore

women = money^2


money is the root of all evil i.e. money = evil^0.5

therefore women = evil

EDIT: i guess a line women = (evil^0.5)^2 in there might make the final substitution easier

holy crap! that's pretty much it! it's so true too. women=evil :D

[Hazmat]

:D Here you go for more proof. (http://www.dogbolter.co.uk/girlsareevil.gif) :D

[catinabag1]

:D Here you go for more proof. (http://www.dogbolter.co.uk/girlsareevil.gif) :D
that is my life motto!

[brendon557]

that is my life motto!
lol, i find that funny, since u ot a dragon ball z guy in ur avatar, and in ur sig thing by ur name u have on eof there moves

[catinabag1]

lol, i find that funny, since u ot a dragon ball z guy in ur avatar, and in ur sig thing by ur name u have on eof there moves
that's just my dream. chicks being evil is my life motto :D

[brendon557]

that's just my dream. chicks being evil is my life motto :D
o ok lol

[johnfoss]

on friday i was at work and i got this girls phone number, she added me on myspace and i just veiwed her profile for the first time and she has a 1month old baby!! and she is 16 toI definitely recommend being able to spell words like "too" and use capital letters before taking on a baby. :rolleyes:

But then again, you had to go on her MySpace page to find out she had this baby? It doesn't sound like she was hiding anything though. It sounds more like you barely know each other, and she just gave you her number. She's not hiding the fact that she has a baby, or it wouldn't be on her MySpace page.

Is a 16 y.o. girl with a 1-month old baby even looking for a boyfriend? That's something to think about. Usually new moms are very focused on their new babies. But this new mom is still a kid herself, so hopefully she has someone helping her with the parenting.

You seem to barely know her, "having just gotten her number." Why was it you wanted to cry?

If your mom's Christian views are front and center, she should be proud that this girl decided to have her baby instead of an abortion. That doesn't put her on the moral high ground compared to you though, because I don't think you were involved in that decision with your girlfriend from before.

As is almost always, always the case, be honest with her. If you like her, just tell her you do but you don't want to get emotionally involved because you're not ready to take on a parental role. Then you'll soon know if she's looking for a friend or a daddy.

and remeber, it dosent matter much what you mother think, just as long as you take and respect her opinion of the situationI don't think that's true until you live in your own place. Until then, you're a minor living under your parents' roof and it matters a lot more what they think. It's tough being a minor if you want to do "adult" things. Being a friend is perfectly safe though, and as long as you don't get emotionally attached you might get some good education for when you maybe become a dad in the future. When you're ready, that is.

[maestro8]

In that case, surely, your mom will find it in herself to FORGIVE this poor girl her 'mistake'?
OOH, SNAP!

i culd care less
http://www.incompetech.com/Images/caring.png

[kington99]

holy crap! that's pretty much it! it's so true too. women=evil :D


the flaw ofc is that women take time and money i.e. women = time + money

which means women = 2 (evil)^0.5, not so catchy



maestro, i am robbing the caring continuum for future use

[vanpaun]

Hawo vanpaun. :D


1) WHOA DUDE!!! :eek:

http://www.hss.state.ak.us/press/2005/pr022305alaskansunite.htm

theres other articles, but yeah

[StephenH]

My advice: Get to know the girl better without starting a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship.

It may be that she's looking for Dad for #2. If so, that sounds like a situation to avoid at this stage in your life. And, if that's the case, don't be afraid to tell her that.

It may be that she is so ditzy or apathetic that it is just meaningless to her how many babies she pops out or who the dads are or why. That sounds like another situation to be avoided.

Or it may be that she's a fairly normal girl that has a 1-month old baby. If that means you're not interested in even being a friend, there's probably not a good way to get it across, but she'll probably figure it out on her own, too. Things do change when you have a kid, and your social life is one of those things that changes. (And if it really is only because of your mom, tell her that, but don't just use that as an excuse.) If you're still interested in knowing her, but not sure how to work it with your mom, I'd say the key is "very slowly". Get to know her better so when your mom asks questions, you'll have answers. It may be a lot easier to have her as a friend than as a girlfriend. If she's been a friend for a while, it'd be a lot easier to for her to become a girlfriend than just starting from scratch. You might even consider asking your mom what she would do in your situation. (This is probably more likely to work than you think it will, if approached in just the right way.)

Right offhand, I can think of two women I know that had kids when young and unmarried. One is the mother of my daughter's two friends. She's an okay person, but her life has kind of been a soap opera, too. The other gave her daughter up for adoption (this was years ago) and only got to know her daughter when she was grown. But I know that lady from church; she's a first class person, too. The moral is, you can't really discern a whole lot from the baby alone. In the case of this girl, I'd say it's more important where she's going than where she's been.

By the way, if the girl is a typical mom, the baby will be a big part of her conversation; don't be afraid to ask her about it.

[uni57]

maestro, i am robbing the caring continuum for future useWhatever. I'm sure he could care less.

[zfreak220]

did nobody read the thread title?

JUST BE HONEST WITH BOTH HER AND YOUR MOM ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS ABOUT HER BEING PREGNANT. IT'D BE BETTER IF YOU TOLD YOUR MOM NOW THAN IF YOUR MOM FOUND OUT LATER. AND IT'D BE BETTER TO BE HONEST WITH THE GIRL BEFORE YOU GET INTO AN EVEN WORSE SITUATION.

[kington99]

Whatever. I'm sure he could care less.


i think in this case that is technically accurate

[BillyTheMountain]

Any update?

[DarkTom]

chicks are evil. i have mathematical proof!:D

That's a bit harsh. I have found that some women are evil, but all women called Emma are evil. I heard this theory bloody ages ago, and have since found it to be true.

All Emmas are evil.


T.

[yoopers]

That's a bit harsh. I have found that some women are evil, but all women called Emma are evil. I heard this theory bloody ages ago, and have since found it to be true.

All Emmas are evil.


T.
Raphael has a daughter named Emma. I imagine there are times when he might agree with that. :)

But overall, from what I know, R is helplessly, hopelessly, wildly in love with his daughter.

[Unitik908]

What is it with you and under age pregnancy?

i was about to say, don't you have a kid on the way??
cause if you do, that's kinda shadey bro.

Chase

[peleschramm]

If I were you, I would just chill with her a bit and then if you end up liking her enough then just go for it. Otherwise just be friends. Say you want to "take it slow". Really, I could not say what I would do unless I knew the girl but just kinda try it out a bit more and then decide.