Ask a Stupid Question - Get a Stupid Answer

[ivan]

This is a rip-off thread from physicsforums.com. But I think it's really cool. So, here we go:

If you knew of a place where you could get a really really cheap laugh, how often would you go there?

[Tyler_N]

This is a rip-off thread from physicsforums.com. But I think it's really cool. So, here we go:

If you knew of a place where you could get a really really cheap laugh, how often would you go there?
how often wouldn't you go there?

[ivan]

As often as I could.

What is the main advantage of a cow before a jet-propelled helicopter in terms of colour theory?

[Bondo]

As often as I could.

What is the main advantage of a cow before a jet-propelled helicopter in terms of colour theory?

On a treadmill?
The cow will take off.

[ivan]

You're supposed to ask a stupid question after you answer.

[Tyler_N]

how old is time?

[Bondo]

You're supposed to ask a stupid question after you answer.


I did, but you didn't...

but I answered my own stupid question...

and your answer isn't very stupid.

How is this game played again??

[Into the blue]

How is this game played again??

You'll find a list of rules here...
http://www.simplych.com/cb_rules.htm

[thejdw]

how old is time?
old enough to be in an OAP home, thats for sure

If a tree falls and nobodys around, what sound does it make?

[1-wheeled-grape]

i dont know if i ever hear it ill tell you

if 1 syncronised swimmer drowns do the others have to drown too:confused:

[thejdw]

i dont know if i ever hear it ill tell you

if 1 syncronised swimmer drowns do the others have to drown too:confused:
If there dedicated enough

do you watch porn?

[1-wheeled-grape]

why do you want to know

if barbie is so popular why do you have to buy her boy friends:rolleyes:

[thejdw]

why do you want to know

if barbie is so popular why do you have to buy her boy friends:rolleyes:
to avoid pollution laws

whats the meaning of life?

[Bondo]

42


Why do men have nipples??

[thejdw]

42


Why do men have nipples??
because the male embryo follows the pattern of a female during the first few weeks of pregnancy, Jade's boyfriends answ: Whats an embryo? :confused:

Why do people unicycle?

[Bondo]

Why do people unicycle?

I don't know about the others...
but unicycling fills that spot in my soul where Jesus is supposed to be!


How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie-Pop??

[gkmac]

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie-Pop??Depends how big it is.

If the mind and body are separate things, how does prozac work?

[ivan]

Devastatingly.

How come the don't sell globes of Europe?

[Tyler_N]

Devastatingly.

How come the don't sell globes of Europe?
'cause i said so

what if the best unicycle you can't afford

[ivan]

Then it sucks.

Do you really undestand the meaning of really?

[hugo]

This is a really difficult question.

How many eggs will fit into a fridge, while 2 ants carry a tank across the street?

[ridingwithscissors]

-3. duh.


Where?

[wickedbob]

What about porn? Better not leave me out!

[hansc]

That wasn't a question.

Was it?

[wickedbob]

I belive it was.

Am I wrong?

[thejdw]

indefinetly

How many arms, does an octapus have?

[UniBrier]

How many arms, does an octapus have?None, there is no such thing.

How many tentacles does an octopus have?

[ivan]

Enough to be called a penguin.

What is the reason behind your madness?

[UniBrier]

What is the reason behind your madness?Children.


This is from another thread but more appropriate here:

If one has a doctorate in physics, you can call them doctor but are they a physician?

[ivan]

You can call them sweetie-honey-pumpkin. If that's not good enough, nothing is.

Why aren't there any bees inside honey?

[Borgschulze]

Because the bees are the creators of honey.

Why isn't the Earth dead yet?

[maestro8]

Why aren't there any bees inside honey?
For the same reason why you don't find any poodles in noodles.

Why does every day of the week end in "-day"? Isn't that redundant?

[ivan]

You could start your movement to call them Mon, Tue, Wen, Thur...

Do radioactive cats have 18 half-lives?

[jamessd]

You could start your movement to call them Mon, Tue, Wen, Thur...

Do radioactive cats have 18 half-lives?
I don't know, ask them not me!

Why did the chicken cross the road?

[ivan]

In order to completely confuse and buffle millions of people in the following generations.

Can Jesus whisper a prayer so quietly that he himself couldn't hear it?

[harper]

You're supposed to ask a stupid question after you answer.

According to the thread title you're supposed to ask a stupid question before you give the stupid answer. I'll try to straighten this thread out.

Why can't you smoke on the bus?

Only in Hebrew.

[DanLee]

If there are no such things as stupid questions then how does this thread work?

Because smoke already comes out of the exaust pipe

[TattooedBandit]

There are no stupid questions, only stupid people.

If 299792.458 km/s is the speed of light, then what is the speed of darkness?

[1-wheeled-grape]

its not dark, everyone goes blind at the same time

if your travelling at the speed of light and you turn your lights on what happens??

[TattooedBandit]

if your travelling at the speed of light and you turn your lights on what happens??
LOL...never heard that one before. I suppose the universe is destroyed.

If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?

[Marijn@Belgium]

None of both.

Why are there woman?

M@B

[TattooedBandit]

To make my dinner and get me another beer.:D Oh, and one other thing aswell.;)

What else would they be for?

[Borges]

To make my dinner and get me another beer.:D Oh, and one other thing aswell.;)

What else would they be for?

I say they are for real

but what do I know?

[ivan]

Just about everything?

Which cruel rogue put the letter 's' in the word lisp?

[thejdw]

Just about everything?

Which cruel rogue put the letter 's' in the word lisp?
the dictator of north korea

whats the worst way to die?

[Bondo]

Smothered under Rosie O'Donnell.

At what altitude do the deer turn into elk??

[frogger]

The same altitude that pigs start flying

why do all the christmas storyes have snow on chrismas day??

P.S. I never have snow on chrismas

[thejdw]

The same altitude that pigs start flying

why do all the christmas storyes have snow on chrismas day??

P.S. I never have snow on chrismas
Because it means less time spent on the artwork

Why do packets that say "easy open" always require sisors to get them open?

[1-wheeled-grape]

because theyre easy to open with sisors

what if a bottle lid said open some where else??

[uni_jim]

because theyre easy to open with sisors

what if a bottle lid said open some where else??

then don't try to open it here

why do frogs sit on logs?

[frogger]

because there the best seats in the woods

Why would some one pay 2000$ for a dress that they are going to wear one time and not pay 750$ of a good unicycle??

[1-wheeled-grape]

there suffering mild insanity

are cheerios doughnut seeds??

[uni_jim]

there suffering mild insanity

are cheerios doughnut seeds??

no, timbits are

how the heck did that cow jump over the moon?

[1-wheeled-grape]

he had a trampoline and a run up

if you run backwards do you gain weight??

[uni_jim]

yes, but only on thursdays between 5:46 and 7:02am

what is the meaning of death?

[orbis]

-42

what is a question?

[uni_jim]

a lack of an answer

who here likes george bush?

[1-wheeled-grape]

ask a ghost

if it takes three men a week to wakk a fortnight how many apples are in a barrel of pairs??:eek:

[uni_jim]

if the apples are in barrels of pairs, then two, if in a barrel of pears, then none.

where is the other wheel? :D

[1-wheeled-grape]

its sleeping, it was tired
wheres your sence of humour:D ??

[uni_jim]

with my sleeping wheel.

where is your mom?

[uni_jim]

oh wait! she is with my sense of humor!

why can chuck norris devide by zero?

[frogger]

He has no brain to divide with.

what's a note??

[uni_jim]

a clever way for your doctor to help you skip class.

what is a catalogue?

[frogger]

some thing you buy stuff from.

Will you marry me?

[dudewithasock]

In one of many parallel universes.

Why is ice cream just so gosh darned tasty?

[UniBrier]

Use of high quality ice.

Where do herbivore ruminants get their protein?

[mill_mobile]

From a tortise shell.

Why are paper clips bent the way they are? Surely there is another way they could be bent to perform the same way.

[Tyler_N]

From a tortise shell.

Why are paper clips bent the way they are? Surely there is another way they could be bent to perform the same way.
because it looks cooler that way

why are rubix cubes so easy

[Hazmat]

Because you can turn and twist to your insane enjoyment. :D


Why is the world round???

[Borges]

Why is the world round???

Corners where cut.

Question:

"I'm from Massachusetts and I feel we have a certain right to gloat over the other states because Massachusetts is after all the only state with three senators."

Why was that funny in 1965?

[caudy]

Because in 1965 frogs danced on the moon.

How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?

[maestro8]

How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?

If teflon is non-stick, how do they get it to stay on a frying pan?

The ocean would be shallower without sponges. Approximately sixteen spatulas shallower per 1.21 giga-sponges.

[chuckaeronut]

As much as they'd pay me to kill them ... first.

How much sharper and more sensitive would pictures from digital cameras be if they used three individual sensors instead of Bayer interpolation (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bayer_interpolation) to generate color?

[unibikeling]

hmm... Sensitive enough to understand women

can you smell the color nine? and if so, what does it taste like?

[UniBrier]

Probably not, they never got past Chanel No. 5. If so it would taste like perfume.

What is the difference between perfume and cologne?

[ivan]

Cologne is a city and perfume is a smelly liquid.

How many roads must a man walk down if he/she wants to go to the chemist?

[tomblackwood]

How many roads must a man walk down if he/she wants to go to the chemist?
It depends...is his goal to be called a man?

[UniBrier]

Can a stupid answer be a stupid question? (If we're not careful here we may end up with another Who's Line thread.)

[thejdw]

Can a stupid answer be a stupid question? (If we're not careful here we may end up with another Who's Line thread.)
facebook

if the universe is expanding, then what are we expanding in to?

[unibikeling]

facebook

if the universe is expanding, then what are we expanding in to?

Brad Pitt's face

how many roads must a man skip down?

[Tyler_N]

Brad Pitt's face

how many roads must a man skip down?
just one, but is has to be Gay St.

How many Powdered Blue Prius's must a gay man drive

[1-wheeled-grape]

just one, any more is an insult to wheels

how many holes would there be if we could be bothered to take the dirt out of them??

[unibikeling]

just one, any more is an insult to wheels

how many holes would there be if we could be bothered to take the dirt out of them??

or, is the question - how many non holes would there be if we bothered to take the dirt out of everything?

[jamessd]

or, is the question - how many non holes would there be if we bothered to take the dirt out of everything?
I don't know, ask the.... pope?

If the human brain was a computer, how much HDD would one have, and how much RAM? (for multitasking...)

[unibikeling]

I don't know, ask the.... pope?

If the human brain was a computer, how much HDD would one have, and how much RAM? (for multitasking...)

well, if it was you it'd have 2kbs of hdd, and 3kb of ram

What stage of evolution are the tribal peoples of the islands of south india?

[vanpaun]

The part where they make lame ass indie movies.

What color is the word color?

[unibikeling]

The part where they make lame ass indie movies.

What color is the word color?

the color of superwomens invisible jet

why havent we impeached george bush yet? (p.s. i lowercased his name on purpose, he doesnt diserve propper caps)

[50 Percent]

because he hasent done anything wrong

why hasnt hillary given up yet?

[vanpaun]

because we dont like peaches anymore, we like apricots.

if today were yesterday, wouldn'nt it be tommorow?

EDIT, you beat me to it

Hilary, cause she is really a terminator

[unibikeling]

because we dont like peaches anymore, we like apricots.

if today were yesterday, wouldn'nt it be tommorow?

EDIT, you beat me to it

Hilary, cause she is really a terminator

74

how often do you have to do the robot in the shower to consider yourself weird?

[Tyler_N]

74

how often do you have to do the robot in the shower to consider yourself weird?
too often.

why is the world round

[unibikeling]

too often.

why is the world round

because if it was square the queen of england via 1500's would be right, and forever kill all knowledge

whens the end of enternity?

[vanpaun]

after the begining of infinity.

why is chuck norris awesome?

[UniBrier]

Because he only has some awe.

Why am I still at work?

[vanpaun]

because you have no life.

Whats the point of life (not the answer, which is 42)

[unibikeling]

because you have no life.

Whats the point of life (not the answer, which is 42)

to live, look at jobs, whats money for? to buy things for better living.. sheesh

what currency do fish use?

[vanpaun]

I dunno, but they weigh it on scales!

Who is the walrus?

[Tyler_N]

to live, look at jobs, whats money for? to buy things for better living.. sheesh

what currency do fish use?



they live in a utopia and they have outgrown the need for currency

darn! beat me to it

the walrus is a fictional character in your imagination and has wings


why do fish have scales?

[UniBrier]

To weigh their currency.

Why do fools fall in love?

[unibikeling]

To weigh their currency.

Why do fools fall in love?

because they dont know what hate is...

why do we accidently skip peoples posts?

[vanpaun]

they live in a utopia and they have outgrown the need for currency

darn! beat me to it

the walrus is a fictional character in your imagination and has wings


why do fish have scales? But who is the walrus?

EDIT: i feel a paradox coming along

[jimbojones]

there is no "the walrus" there ia a walrus but thats a different story for a different day. the is a misappropriatly used word

what is a walrus?

[beeper]

there is no "the walrus" there ia a walrus but thats a different story for a different day. the is a misappropriatly used word

what is a walrus?


To get to the other side.

Why don't gas companies sell cars?

[chuckaeronut]

They've got all the money they need.

Are round pixels better than square ones?

[Jerrick]

They've got all the money they need.

Are round pixels better than square ones?

Of course. Round ones bounce when you throw them.

Will elevators ever become an extreme sport?

[UniBrier]

Only when they replace the cables with bungee cords.

How many stupid questions are there? (If we use them all up here we will rid the world of stupid questions!)

[yoopers]

Always one more.

If the universe is constantly expanding, why does it still take me exactly 18½ minutes to walk around my block?

[ivan]

Your legs are part of the universe and therefore get bigger too.

Was ist das?

[yoopers]

Your legs are part of the universe and therefore get bigger too.

Was ist das?
Yes, it was.

If most accidents occur within 5 miles of home, why don't we all
just move 10 miles away ?

[50 Percent]

beacause there are no bones in ice cream

why are there no bones in ice cream?

[1-wheeled-grape]

because we dont live ten miles away

if rabbits feet are so lucky what happened to the rabbit??

[unibikeling]

because we dont live ten miles away

if rabbits feet are so lucky what happened to the rabbit??

The rabbit sponaneously disapeared after jerrick was attempting to catch it, he had it by the foot, and it just disapeared, the only reason jerrick didnt dissapear as well was because, of course, hes magic

edit: whatever jerrick touches becomes magic too, thats why the rabbit foot is lucky, and why it stayed in his hand. he exports rabbits feet all the time

when will i have 13,000 posts?

[unibikeling]

You will get 13000 posts after you die.

Where do I not live?

the suburbs of Chicago

When was the wheel invented?

[1-wheeled-grape]

shortly after they discovered squares dont roll

how do "keep off the grass" signs get where they are??

[unibikeling]

shortly after they discovered squares dont roll

how do "keep off the grass" signs get where they are??

leprecauns, its simple, really

why do they even attempt to have grass in arizona?

[1-wheeled-grape]

to feed a couple goats and a sheep
why cant pigs fly yet

[ivan]

Because they can't look up.

What is the sequence preceding to the following number? 1.

[Tyler_N]

Because they can't look up.

What is the sequence preceding to the following number? 1.
2 3 5 7 11 13 17 19 23 27 31 37

do you need to answer a stupid question before asking one?

[DanLee]

Well you dont NEED to, but if you dont it puts the next person to post in a very akward situation.

So i have a peanut butter and jelly sandwitch with the peanut butter on top of the jelly. Personally i perfer to have the jelly on top of the peanut butter, how can I fix this?

[Tyler_N]

Well you dont NEED to, but if you dont it puts the next person to post in a very akward situation.

So i have a peanut butter and jelly sandwitch with the peanut butter on top of the jelly. Personally i perfer to have the jelly on top of the peanut butter, how can I fix this?
you could eat it while you are upside down.

you know what im sayin'?

[unibikeling]

you could eat it while you are upside down.

you know what im sayin'?

fo shniz no! no one bepoperoo knowz whatz yall izle talkinz bouuuuuuuut

aiiiiight?

[Tyler_N]

fo shniz no! no one bepoperoo knowz whatz yall izle talkinz bouuuuuuuut

aiiiiight?
yeea, dawg.


how much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?

[UniBrier]

As much as the catapult can hold.

Anyone else want to go skiing & boarding with us today (We're leaving in an hour)?

[$unidude$chad$:)]

eat the pb&j on a unicycle swinging from a rope being held by one of your best reinds that is very strong and won't drop u on your head:p

[orbis]

Nice question

If adam had 2 balls, how many did eve have?:confused:

[thejdw]

Nice question

If adam had 2 balls, how many did eve have?:confused:
40

If new york is in america, then were is old york?

[unibikeling]

40

If new york is in america, then were is old york?

in the soviet union

if i wasnt from america, what country would i be from?

[Jerrick]

in the soviet union

if i wasnt from america, what country would i be from?

Planet X.

Jerrick?

[orbis]

How did you know,


Are you a unicyclist, or a joke?

[unibikeling]

How did you know,


Are you a unicyclist, or a joke?

personally, im a mumified tortis with rainbows for wings, and a heart of uranium 245

does uranium 245 exist? or am i thinking of another number for that radioactive stuff?

[ivan]

You were thinking of deep-fried mars bars. That's all you ever think about.

If something is very spicy they say it's hot. If something is even spicier they say it's chilly. Why do they do this to us?

[unisteve]

The better question is who is They and why they are stalking me on Facebook.

Could the Lock Ness monster just be a giant eel?

[unibikeling]

The better question is who is They and why they are stalking me on Facebook.

Could the Lock Ness monster just be a giant eel?

no, because thats what the yetti is, the lock ness monster is jerrick (no offense)

why is jerrick the lock ness monster?

[unibikeling]

Because you are the yetti, a giant eel.

why is unibikeling the yetti?

because your mom is a semi collon

if were all of this, then what is gilby?

[$unidude$chad$:)]

he's just in his own land


Q: why do we have an easter bunny that lays eggs (bunny's don't lay eggs chickens do so shouldn't there be an easter chicken??)

[unibikeling]

he's just in his own land


Q: why do we have an easter bunny that lays eggs (bunny's don't lay eggs chickens do so shouldn't there be an easter chicken??)

dont worry, we'll cut down a tree in winter to make up for it, and put some candy in socks, and get a leprecaun

why am i bored?

[$unidude$chad$:)]

:rolleyes: because you have nothing else to do like me and are sitting infront of your computer screen like a freakin zombie(like me)


who's ever put a bag of M&M's on layaway at walmrt b4!?

[unibikeling]

:rolleyes: because you have nothing else to do like me and are sitting infront of your computer screen like a freakin zombie(like me)


who's ever put a bag of M&M's on layaway at walmrt b4!?

not me, i think

whats a layaway?

[unibikeling]

a layaway is that thing at walmrt with M&M's on it...

Who thinks that UNICON XVI should be in Alaska?

on the other hand, who thinks it should be near me, in minnesota or something, again

[$unidude$chad$:)]

wed all have to travel
and put spikes on our tirres


who has a science project to do??

[unibikeling]

wed all have to travel
and put spikes on our tirres


who has a science project to do??

im in science next trimester, so what do i know

why did our school change to trimesters from quarters?

[DanLee]

Not the people who have a math midterm to study for(like me)

I was buttoning my shirt the other day and i noticed that i had one extra button at the top of one side, and an extra hole for a button on the bottom of the other side. How much would it cost to repair this?

[unibikeling]

Not the people who have a math midterm to study for(like me)

I was buttoning my shirt the other day and i noticed that i had one extra button at the top of one side, and an extra hole for a button on the bottom of the other side. How much would it cost to repair this?

please contact a sweatshop to find out, or call the white house

anyone other than me know the whitehouses phone number?

[Jerrick]

911
I call it all the time!

Why are people who crach planes silly?

Rhinos cant fly.

I love lamp?

[unibikeling]

Rhinos cant fly.

I love lamp?

soy la lampara!

seriously, whats a layaway?

[catinabag1]

me after i rack myself on my uni seat.

if a seal plays poker with a snail and the two fall in love, will the moon set?

[unibikeling]

me after i rack myself on my uni seat.

if a seal plays poker with a snail and the two fall in love, will the moon set?

only after mars attacks

has anyone else saw the movie im refering to?

[catinabag1]

only after mars attacks

has anyone else saw the movie im refering to?

iv'e seen mars attacks if that wat ur refering to.

at what time does roger square dance with a duck every tuesday?

[UniBrier]

Depends whether it's a three or four step dance.

I know someone from Turner, what are the chances you know them too?

[catinabag1]

Depends whether it's a three or four step dance.

I know someone from Turner, what are the chances you know them too?

i might know them if u told me who they were.

a fish was riding a giraffe on wednesday. what does that make sally?

[Kyle_Destroyer]

i might know them if u told me who they were.

a fish was riding a giraffe on wednesday. what does that make sally?

A zoo enthusiast!

Could God microwave a burrito so hot, that not even he could eat it!?

[catinabag1]

A zoo enthusiast!

Could God microwave a burrito so hot, that not even he could eat it!?

better yet would he even need a microwave?

who goes to the zoo just to watch the monkeys fling their poo?

[unibikeling]

better yet would he even need a microwave?

who goes to the zoo just to watch the monkeys fling their poo?

*entire unicyclist.com community raises hands*

lol.... why dont i go to zoos?

[orbis]

I have no friggen clue...

Why doesnt the third monkey fling poo while the others sleep?

[catinabag1]

I have no friggen clue...

Why doesnt the third monkey fling poo while the others sleep?

he's narcoleptic.

who misses pogs?

[UniBrier]

That would be the wife of Mr. Pogs.

Did you know if you press the SHIFT key the same time as you press the letter key, you can properly capitalize your sentences?

[catinabag1]

That would be the wife of Mr. Pogs.

Did you know if you press the SHIFT key the same time as you press the letter key, you can properly capitalize your sentences?

wHo WoUlDa ThUnK iT!

isnt calvin and hobbes the greatest comic book series ever?

[unibikeling]

wHo WoUlDa ThUnK iT!

isnt calvin and hobbes the greatest comic book series ever?

no, and theres no reason for my answer

where is the rip in the space time continuim?

[catinabag1]

no, and theres no reason for my answer

where is the rip in the space time continuim?

i dont know but it might need to call a tailor.

why is there an upside down question and exclamation mark in the spanish language?

[unibikeling]

i dont know but it might need to call a tailor.

why is there an upside down question and exclamation mark in the spanish language?

if youve ever taken a language course such as spanish, you'll know that it signals that there is a question comming, or an exclemation. Also marked are words with added accents specifically for questions, like como. it's really simple if you take a course lol...

why did i take spanish as a class?

[1-wheeled-grape]

i dont know probably the same reason my class was forced to do gcse spanish in year 9 and every on quit half way through


why did i choose history in year 10 and get stuck doing essays all the time( doin one now:( )

[unibikeling]

i dont know probably the same reason my class was forced to do gcse spanish in year 9 and every on quit half way through


why did i choose history in year 10 and get stuck doing essays all the time( doin one now:( )

because kittens held your super intendint hostage, and forced him to eat limes covered in chocolate

how tasty would limes in chocolate be?

[1-wheeled-grape]

i dont know
has any one tried live worms covered in chocolate??

[unibikeling]

i dont know
has any one tried live worms covered in chocolate??

no, but does this count? http://www.targetofopportunity.com/codepink_fat_lady.jpg

why did i find that picture?

[1-wheeled-grape]

i dont know
who feels sorry for the bench she is sitting on??:D

[unibikeling]

i dont know
who feels sorry for the bench she is sitting on??:D

yeah.. same... i also feel sorry for the moo moo....

who else feels this way?

[kdawg]

i do
do catfish have kittens?

[unibikeling]

i do
do catfish have kittens?

no, they have joeys

lol... why am i watching 'cliffhanger'?

[$unidude$chad$:)]

because it's on television and u pay your monthly bill:D


why shuold i be study'ing for a spanish test?

[kdawg]

i dont know i thought we spoke english in america!
how come words arnt spelled how they sound (fone, nife?)

[C-ZER]

so you will stay in school.


can I fly if I jump off a cliff and am confident that I can.

[unibikeling]

so you will stay in school.


can I fly if I jump off a cliff and am confident that I can.

well, if you step off into dark, you'll either learn to fly or step off onto solid ground.

why am i quoting peiple?

[catinabag1]

sorry i have to answer this one also

so you will stay in school.


can I fly if I jump off a cliff and am confident that I can.

if ur neo. and remember there is no spoon!

is it possible to make lemonande on the back of an elephant while balancing on ur uni?

[Tyler_N]

well, if you step off into dark, you'll either learn to fly or step off onto solid ground.

why am i quoting peiple?
your not the only one.

should i ask a stupid question after i answer a stupid question?

[catinabag1]

your not the only one.

should i ask a stupid question after i answer a stupid question?

weren't we taught there was no stupid question?

what do u get when u cross an owl with a bungie cord? (the movie kung pow)

[The.Mars.Volta]

The following is a true question that someone from work asked me.

'Is New Years Eve the 3rd?'


It took me a while to answer because I was so confused by the stupid question.

[UniBrier]

The following is a true question that someone from work asked me.

'Is New Years Eve the 3rd?'


It took me a while to answer because I was so confused by the stupid question.Mars,

Despite the fact your post is a thread jack which doesn't answer the question before it and ask another stupid question, I must say is it just so refreshing to see someone properly use the shift key in this thread that your post is a welcome return to reality.

Back with the thread, here is an observation that shouldn't be a stupid question but probably will be:

Do you realize there is not one use of the shift key in the prior page (page 12) of this thread? (And is there any way to get the message through to the offenders that posting like that makes them look like a bunch of lazy unejukated idgits?)

[catinabag1]

Mars,

Despite the fact your post is a thread jack which doesn't answer the question before it and ask another stupid question, I must say is it just so refreshing to see someone properly use the shift key in this thread that your post is a welcome return to reality.

Back with the thread, here is an observation that shouldn't be a stupid question but probably will be:

Do you realize there is not one use of the shift key in the prior page (page 12) of this thread? (And is there any way to get the message through to the offenders that posting like that makes them look like a bunch of lazy unejukated idgits?)

the shift key is overrated.

who else thinks the shift key is an uber waste of time since we are not writing an essay that requires u to be anal about every little detail even though u can still understand wat the person is saying.

[unisk8r]

Huh? What did you say?


If old folks don't have alot of time left, why do they drive so slow?

[catinabag1]

Huh? What did you say?


If old folks don't have alot of time left, why do they drive so slow?

i think u should drive a mph over the speed limit for every year ur over 50.

wats the mathematical relation gravity has on the speed of time?

[1-wheeled-grape]

That isnt a question. but i still dont know whet the mathematical relation gravity has on the speed of time is lol

if i hit a cat twice after it had used up 8 of its lives and it survives should i hit it again or class it as a super-cat with 10 lives??

[catinabag1]

That isnt a question. but i still dont know whet the mathematical relation gravity has on the speed of time is lol

if i hit a cat twice after it had used up 8 of its lives and it survives should i hit it again or class it as a super-cat with 10 lives??

freakin park on it.

if everybody loves raymond, who loves me?

[unibikeling]

freakin park on it.

if everybody loves raymond, who loves me?

raymond... duh

why is it ironic that the name of the show is everybody loves raymond, but eveyrone hates the show

[catinabag1]

raymond... duh

why is it ironic that the name of the show is everybody loves raymond, but eveyrone hates the show

i just got done watchin the show and i like it.

what's your favorite kind of mustard?

[C-ZER]

The red kind.


If I wheel walk with two feet how far did I go?

[surfer1024]

'Till they ran out


Is this thread funny?

[catinabag1]

'Till they ran out


Is this thread funny?

at times

what's the deal with airline food?

[UniBrier]

They're dealing from the bottom deck.

Is it smart to post before the morning coffee has kicked in?

[hugo]

As long as you are smart before the morning coffee has kicked in, yes.

Why do people park their cars on pavements?

[caudy]

If people left their cars anywhere else they would be abducted by joyriding monkeys.

Does telekinesis exist?

[UniBrier]

Absolutely, who hasn't been moved by a mere look by that special someone?

(Yes, that is an answer and a new stupid question all rolled into one.)

[hugo]

Me.

Why do we waste our time by asking stupid questions, expecting stupid answers? :D

[unibikeling]

no clue, its fun..

why am i sneaking on the fora at school?

[catinabag1]

because learning when to say "whom" or "who" is going to make your life complete. school blows.

is unicycling an art or a science?

[1-wheeled-grape]

niether unicycling is living, art and science are taught in schools, unicycling isnt.
how many posts will there be in this thread when it dies (if it ever does)

[catinabag1]

niether unicycling is living, art and science are taught in schools, unicycling isnt.
how many posts will there be in this thread when it dies (if it ever does)

this post needs to continue living. and its agreed that unicycling is life.

how many dirty stinking apes does it take to change a light bulb?

[1-wheeled-grape]

5 and a bag of peanuts
does expecting the unexpected make the unexpected expected??

[catinabag1]

5 and a bag of peanuts
does expecting the unexpected make the unexpected expected??

that's deep and philosophical. and yes.

if a train travels south at 24.5 mph and another train travels north at 42.45 mph and the trains start 250.99 miles apart, how long does it take the trains to meet?

[Tyler_N]

that's deep and philosophical. and yes.

if a train travels south at 24.5 mph and another train travels north at 42.45 mph and the trains start 250.99 miles apart, how long does it take the trains to meet?
approximately 3.122 hours

why are you asking us to do your homework?

[catinabag1]

approximately 3.122 hours

why are you asking us to do your homework?

it was a stupid question.

did anyone actually calculate that?

[Tyler_N]

it was a stupid question.

did anyone actually calculate that?
i did, might not be right though. i just learned how to solve that yesterday


a freight train leaves at 10:01 going at a 160 mph. a passenger train leaves at 12:01 going 185 mph. both trains are traveling on a parallel track. What is the color of the second train? (show your work :) )

[catinabag1]

i did, might not be right though. i just learned how to solve that yesterday


a freight train leaves at 10:01 going at a 160 mph. a passenger train leaves at 12:01 going 185 mph. both trains are traveling on a parallel track. What is the color of the second train? (show your work :) )

why the second train is rainbow colored because its "special" ;) question.

cream cheese maple bars are the best donuts are they not?

[Tyler_N]

why the second train is rainbow colored because its "special" ;) question.

cream cheese maple bars are the best donuts are they not?
no they arn't


Cream filled donuts are the best are they not

[ivan]

No they aren't. I'm the best.

Did you know that there are no stupid questions, only inquisitive idiots?

[caudy]

Yes, it's been a well established fact since the dawn of time.

Is the name spatula really neccessary or is it just there to provide comic entertainment?

[Borges]

The name spatula means little broad sword. Spatulas are very proud of the name and think it puts them at least as high as the knives in the pecking order of kitchen utensils.

If my car has an Anti lock Breaking System (ABS) why do I need a car alarm too?

[kidmuni]

If my car has an Anti lock Breaking System (ABS) why do I need a car alarm too?
they look cool!

[C-ZER]

If my car has an Anti lock Breaking System (ABS) why do I need a car alarm too?

The car alarm is the Anti lock Breaking System it is a two in one.



If I am panning for gold and get a goldfish in my pan do I yell “eureka!,” or do I fry it up and eat it?

[orbis]

Eureka! You should fry it up and shout dirt.

If i post now, will i answer my question???

[orbis]

I guess not...

Does the moon have 99 sides, or does it have bones?

[catinabag1]

I guess not...

Does the moon have 99 sides, or does it have bones?

it has a splean.

how old is the man on the moon?

[$unidude$chad$:)]

20

why has hilary clinton got so far in teh electoin

[1-wheeled-grape]

when no one votes for her later they can laugh as she fails miserably
why does every one steriotype unicyclists as clowns whan im obviously not (dont know about you guys)

[$unidude$chad$:)]

i want to be a clown when i grow up:D and idk it's kinda stupid to associate that , that just means they r jealous


why can't i figure out mills mess and it's driving me insane

[caudy]

because it will come with time

Why do chickens get sterotyped for their road crossing ability?

[1-wheeled-grape]

because they cannot fly
if you were to win the lottery whats the craziest thing you would never think of buying??

[thejdw]

because they cannot fly
if you were to win the lottery whats the craziest thing you would never think of buying??
playboy manshion

why do some people hate the internet?

[1-wheeled-grape]

because there are to many people not doing stupid enough stuff to make sense
who else here things that iggy pop "the passenger" is an awesome song??

[caudy]

It is rather good.
why is a single wheel such an attractive prospect?

[1-wheeled-grape]

for its simplcity and manuverability and the feeling you are a special tallented evolved breed of the human race
if weve evolved from monkeys why didnt the other monkeys evolve too??

[caudy]

The other monkeys were distracted by some rather tasty looking monkey food when the evolving process occured.

What do monkeys eat?

[1-wheeled-grape]

what ever they can get, my sister went to the zoo the other day and a monkey ate its own poo, not nice lol
where did dinosaus come from?? and where did they go??

[catinabag1]

what ever they can get, my sister went to the zoo the other day and a monkey ate its own poo, not nice lol
where did dinosaus come from?? and where did they go??

your mom and they turned invisible

if u put a picket fence around your house will you get paid more?

[1-wheeled-grape]

only if your related to an invisable dinosaur
why did james loose at whatever he lost at??

[jamessd]

only if your related to an invisable dinosaur
why did james loose at whatever he lost at??
because some people in the pub are blody bad losers!


why is this? [lol]

[1-wheeled-grape]

because you live in little clacton where crime is pathetic, they cheat and steal.
why am i still slouching on a bean bag at 00:02?? on th forums??

[caudy]

Same reason why I'm writing this. I don't know what the reason is. It probably involves the amount of effort need to stand up.

If a unicyclist falls over in a forest does anyone hear them?

[1-wheeled-grape]

if theres some one else in the forest
is there someone else in the forest??

[catinabag1]

if theres some one else in the forest
is there someone else in the forest??

there is unless the first guy smells

if a unicycle falls on a gopher, does the sound the gopher makes count?

[_Ground_Zero_]

there is unless the first guy smells

if a unicycle falls on a gopher, does the sound the gopher makes count?

Depends on whether or not the gopher is mute and can make a sound.

Why do they sell pizza in a square box?

[uni_jim]

they don't. they sell square boxes filled with round pizza.

is math a religion? I mean you take one number, combine it with another, and you magically end up with a third number. nobody can explain why this happens, you just have to believe it to be true. So, is math a religion?

(if so, i just found an easy way to get out of class every day: "Sorry Mrs. Gourley, I can't take part in your linear rituals today, it's against my religion.")

[C-ZER]

No. it is fusion of numbers resulting in a numeric value meant to be a logical representation of data.


If I hit my shins on my peddles more than once and it really hurts and a girl told me that I have nice shins but she saw them before I started unicycling and now I have scars all over them should I get shin guards to prevent future damage.

[1-wheeled-grape]

yes, basically
if one person eats 2 bits of bacon and a sausage, what is the chances the second person will break his legs??

[C-ZER]

The second person only has one leg.

If I make a new myspace profile will you ever see me again?

[1-wheeled-grape]

have i seen you before, we might we might not
why are parents always so moody in the mornings??

[catinabag1]

have i seen you before, we might we might not
why are parents always so moody in the mornings??

because the woman always turns the guy down the night before, if you know what i mean.

why do people pay $7 for a cup of coffee that you can make yourself for cents?

[Tyler_N]

because the woman always turns the guy down the night before, if you know what i mean.

why do people pay $7 for a cup of coffee that you can make yourself for cents?
because the more they pay for it the better they think it costs

aren't video games evil?

[caudy]

They are fine. People who cannot distingush between reality and a game and are influenced by them in a negative way are lacking in a number of mental departments.

What is the meaning of life?

[1-wheeled-grape]

42
who here thinks the hitch hikers guide to the gallaxy is the most important thing youll ever need, other than a single wheel:D??

[caudy]

On a scale of inportance it would be pretty near the top (not quite as important as a towel).

Is vogon poetry really that bad?

[ivan]

Have it read to you and see for yourself.

What was a dead swan doing at the bottom of a black lake?

[caudy]

It used to be a fish in a former life and it was reincarnated as a swan. By the time the swan realised it couldn't breathe under water it was too late.

Is abstract art any good?

[1-wheeled-grape]

ofcourse it is
why do seals choose to live in the skanky river colne in colchester

[caudy]

theres some good job prospects round there and the quisine and nightlife isn't too bad for the seals there either.

Why is the sea blue?

[vanpaun]

Because if it werent unicycles wouldnt have seats, but instead a "personal" device.

if i juggle three balls and you juggle four, if you pass me one and i pass you one which is dropped, and i pick it up but unfortonalely knock you over making you drop 2 balls, how many are still being juggled. Isnt it 7 because the balls reproduce 1 per every 10 seconds?

[catinabag1]

Because if it werent unicycles wouldnt have seats, but instead a "personal" device.

if i juggle three balls and you juggle four, if you pass me one and i pass you one which is dropped, and i pick it up but unfortonalely knock you over making you drop 2 balls, how many are still being juggled. Isnt it 7 because the balls reproduce 1 per every 10 seconds?

i didn't know balls fornicate

how can i increase the gas mileage of my unicycle?

[uni_jim]

i didn't know balls fornicate

how can i increase the gas mileage of my unicycle?

don't eat beans, hard boiled eggs, or bananas.
what is the square rout of -42, and does it impact our previous conception of the meaning of life?

[1-wheeled-grape]

you cant find the square route of a minus, but the square route of 42 is 6.48. yes it impacts the meaning o life becase we evoled to be bigger and better like the numbers:p :D
does what i just wrote make any sense at all??

[jamessd]

No, because you did not answer the previous question.
The square root of a minus is in fact an imaginary number.

how does this make sense?: 11 was a racehorse 12 was 12, 1111 race 12112.